You know your man loves you and you want him to show it. But
he doesn’t show of off! You just
need a little extra attention from him. But
unfortunately you are married to someone who is not your perfect dream life partner. So you
have to make him understand that you need little more expressiveness. This
does not mean that you have to change him, it would be impossible. You
just have to make him aware of what you want from him.
Relationships vary
with couple as people are of different kinds. We cannot give you an advice to apply for your
man to become the most considerate man in the world overnight. But we can give
you an advice to apply depending on the situation you're in. The first
thing to do is to understand why your man is not attentive to you. This step
will not necessarily be easy because it can reveal some problems in your
relationship, but you must go through it.
By nature he is not
caring?
Life is not like a movie.
It may be simple that your man is not naturally attentive. It's not the
lack of love for you or because there is something wrong in your relationship
but because caring is not in his nature. This may be because no one has
ever really been attentive towards him or because he never had the sense to have
showing care to anyone. If this is the case, do not blame him. You
have to make him understand that this is important to you and you need that extra
attention.
To make him understand
that, you have two options: To discuss with him and be yourself attentive to
him. If being attentive is not in his nature, you should not wait until he
changes miraculously. He will not wake up one morning and say "Let's go,
I'll become a caring man!". You are the change for your man.
And as often happens
in a couple, one of the steps to achieve it is to talk, to communicate. You
cannot escape it. In this situation, there is one thing you must remember
is that you should not criticize his lack of attention. It is certain that
it annoys him as it does not come naturally to him, but that's not a reason to
blame him. Certainly there are things you do that would make him happy
just because you do not think. It's the same for him.
So you have to
approach things smoothly. Avoid sentences like "You never care for me! "
." You never surprise me!” Or “You never had a small gift for
me! ". Directing destroys all your chances of success. But
to achieve your expectations, you make an effort to propose more and direct less. In
every day life, watching a movie or talking of a book, can suggest him that
"It is wonderful to have such small things in life" Then you can slowly
relate to them that makes you happy. Depending on your husband’s reactions
and your personality, you can then go into more detail and tell him that you
really need that.
But communicating
alone will not help you, unless if you do not have small attention towards
him. It's fine to wait for a change in your man, at the same time you have
to start giving. Give him surprises and be considerate to him. With
a sweet mixture of communication and attention you will soon see your desired
man. But do not get carried away too quickly: it will not happen
overnight.
He is not the same as
before?
Sometimes it happens
that your man has slowly started keeping you away and showing less attention. You
do not understand why there has been this change. You suffer from this change
in him, but there are ways to bring back his attention on you.
For example, take your
man to a place where you used to meet up before. You can start the
discussion and try to understand the reasons for change.
The can be multiple
reasons for such a change. Busy with office work and fatigue can lead to
neglect a relationship. You have to find ways to overcome fatigue. Think
about the events that have happened in the recent past. This will allow
you to see when things started going wrong and above all, know what you want
from your relationship in the future.
Once you think over
that, you can chat freely with your man. This discussion should be
constructive. You must agree accept your mistakes. Ask him the
expectations from you, what currently lacks in it. If you arrive at a
conclusion on the fact that indeed things were not going very well for some
time but want to make every effort to ensure that your marriage gets back in
the saddle, you can bring back your caring husband you've known not so long
ago.
Once things have changed,
you will no longer be afraid to show your consideration towards him. Feel
free to be as attentive as you would like it to be. Attention is an
exchange, it never goes in one direction. Again, this will not be as fast
as you would have hoped. With perseverance you can get there.
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